Dear All,
I hav been superpresent during holidays, but I was working on my thesis…As you may imagine. Everything, now, is settled. I have to submit the very final version and les jeux sont faits.
Do you believe me?
I don’t 🙂
My life has changed a lot since the beginning of this path. At the beginning, I spent hours reading articles, now, few minutes, I spent weeks writing articles, now days, I was unsure about what to do and how to direct other people…now..more or less the same but less anxious 🙂 What has changed more? Time available. I have less time to think, to enjoy life, to waste, to ponder on something, to feel anxious about anything. It is time to reduce the speed of living. At the end of PhD people are literally submerged by businesses (you could swim in), and it is only our fault. Our supervisors, our junior, our parents, friends, bosses, relatives ask for time, for attention. I think the solution is just one. “Say no”. We get used to say “yes” during the PhD, and after to cry at our homes being consumed with grief about how to manage all things.
You know what? Now, you can chose what to manage, when and how. As a researcher we should be able to say no. I am the worst one at doing that. I feel the frustration of people so intensively when I say no, that, egoistically, I prefer saying yes always, and then to complain.
The New Years’ resolution is to say “NO or Yes, but later”…
These are things that I have learnt from my research group, not only on my own.
Another thing is being comfortable at being alone. When you grow, you become alone and alone. It is normal. This has been the first year in which I’ve experience what “managing people” means. It means being feared, often misinterpreted, but often also listened as a guide. Finally, you feel the heavy of responsibility, and it is fine.
World starts turning so fast that you cannot think in a step-wise manner any longer..you should start becoming a manager, take decisions, select things, people, activities and learn the most important thing of all: loosing control. And, loosing control means gaining control. I believe it is like a paradox: doing less to achieve more, controlling over less to manage better…I’ll keep you posted on how to pursue these goals pragmatically (actually, I am still working on it :-)).
I have never gone to slip up so often as in these days, so many mistakes followed by so many laughs. Things have different weights now. I have started seeing life from a different perspective and making different plans for my future.
Is PhD a transformative experience?
Yes, it is, and it looks like more as a mix of posttraumatic and postestatic moments, as Mangelsdorf & Eid (2015) labelled traumatic and positive occasions of transformation in life…
Phd…is like being on a rollercoaster…
Who wanna try?
AWE 